My eldest just started school this week. Being the mother that I am, I was of course, very apprehensive about her first day of school. After all, she was starting school mid-semester. All her classmates started first grade in August of the previous year, so they were all older than her and they have been together for some time.
Before she started school, the school gave her an assessment exam to see if she was fit to join the first graders mid- semester or join the kindergarten 2 class. They were very pleased that she could read very well already and did well in Math so they said she was fit to join the first graders.
On her first day, she took the school bus to school. We went separately and just waited for the arrival of the school bus in school. Despite this being her first time to take the school bus, she was in high spirits when we met her at the bus bay. She never seemed anxious when we brought her to class. She actually looked completely fine in her new surroundings.
At the end of the first day, her teacher sent me an email telling me that my daughter had a fantastic first day at school. She was already participating in class and she even did well
in swimming class (yes, first graders have swimming classes already)! I was so happy with what I have read. But of course, I had to ask my daughter how she felt. When I asked my daughter how school was after her first day, she told me that school was fun. I breathed a sigh of relief.
At the end of each day, I always ask my kids how school was for that day, what they learned, what they did.
On the third night of school, when I asked my daughter how school was, she gave me the same answer, :"It was fun!". But tonight, her story was not finished. She told me one of her female classmates told her:" You're not the smartest student." This short sentence alarmed me! She has only been in the new school for 3 days, and already she gets this comment from her classmate. Despite my unhappiness (to put it mildly) about what I heard, I decided to probe her, while trying to keep my calm. I did not want her to see that the words spoken were not exactly very nice and that I am not happy about it. So, I just asked her what she said in response to that. She told me that she told her classmate that she practices the lessons at home every night. I decided to leave it at that.
The following day, after school, I decided to subtly probe her again regarding her classmate, if anything else was said, if she wanted to give me more details as to the events surrounding the situation. This time, what she told me actually surprised me. My daughter just told me:" It's okay now, Mommy." To which I asked, "What do you mean, it's okay now?" And then she elaborated. Apparently, the day after the incident, my sweet little girl decided to tell the teacher about what happened. The teacher then decided to call the student right away and probed her as to why said those things to my daughter. The teacher then asked her to apologize to my daughter. Before my daughter accepted the apology, she told the girl not to do it again. I told my daughter I was so proud of her, of how she handled the situation. My daughter then continued her story, saying:"Because I can read very well." Apparently, the words may have been spoken because my daughter could read very well.
But, after she told me about what she did, I wasn't sad anymore. I became happy and proud of this little girl. Despite appearing unaffected by words said to her, she decided to handle the situation by herself. In this instance, I never even thought to tell her to talk to her teacher about it.
In the past, I always told her not to pick a fight with her classmates. I always told her, if something happens, if someone is being mean to her or someone hurt her, she should just go to the teacher directly. And that's what she did. She was able to handle herself and the situation very well! This made me so proud of her.
Now that I think about the situation that happened, it made me realize that what happened to my daughter was already a form of bullying. Her classmate was trying to hurt her self-confidence. But what shocked me about it was, even in grade one it can happen. I hope parents can teach their kids to be better human beings. No one should be superior. No one should be inferior. Everyone has their own talents and everyone will learn at their own pace.
But most of all, we should always teach our kids to be confident of themselves and their abilities, and to always remember that they are loved no matter what.
Before she started school, the school gave her an assessment exam to see if she was fit to join the first graders mid- semester or join the kindergarten 2 class. They were very pleased that she could read very well already and did well in Math so they said she was fit to join the first graders.
On her first day, she took the school bus to school. We went separately and just waited for the arrival of the school bus in school. Despite this being her first time to take the school bus, she was in high spirits when we met her at the bus bay. She never seemed anxious when we brought her to class. She actually looked completely fine in her new surroundings.
At the end of the first day, her teacher sent me an email telling me that my daughter had a fantastic first day at school. She was already participating in class and she even did well
in swimming class (yes, first graders have swimming classes already)! I was so happy with what I have read. But of course, I had to ask my daughter how she felt. When I asked my daughter how school was after her first day, she told me that school was fun. I breathed a sigh of relief.
At the end of each day, I always ask my kids how school was for that day, what they learned, what they did.
On the third night of school, when I asked my daughter how school was, she gave me the same answer, :"It was fun!". But tonight, her story was not finished. She told me one of her female classmates told her:" You're not the smartest student." This short sentence alarmed me! She has only been in the new school for 3 days, and already she gets this comment from her classmate. Despite my unhappiness (to put it mildly) about what I heard, I decided to probe her, while trying to keep my calm. I did not want her to see that the words spoken were not exactly very nice and that I am not happy about it. So, I just asked her what she said in response to that. She told me that she told her classmate that she practices the lessons at home every night. I decided to leave it at that.
The following day, after school, I decided to subtly probe her again regarding her classmate, if anything else was said, if she wanted to give me more details as to the events surrounding the situation. This time, what she told me actually surprised me. My daughter just told me:" It's okay now, Mommy." To which I asked, "What do you mean, it's okay now?" And then she elaborated. Apparently, the day after the incident, my sweet little girl decided to tell the teacher about what happened. The teacher then decided to call the student right away and probed her as to why said those things to my daughter. The teacher then asked her to apologize to my daughter. Before my daughter accepted the apology, she told the girl not to do it again. I told my daughter I was so proud of her, of how she handled the situation. My daughter then continued her story, saying:"Because I can read very well." Apparently, the words may have been spoken because my daughter could read very well.
But, after she told me about what she did, I wasn't sad anymore. I became happy and proud of this little girl. Despite appearing unaffected by words said to her, she decided to handle the situation by herself. In this instance, I never even thought to tell her to talk to her teacher about it.
In the past, I always told her not to pick a fight with her classmates. I always told her, if something happens, if someone is being mean to her or someone hurt her, she should just go to the teacher directly. And that's what she did. She was able to handle herself and the situation very well! This made me so proud of her.
Now that I think about the situation that happened, it made me realize that what happened to my daughter was already a form of bullying. Her classmate was trying to hurt her self-confidence. But what shocked me about it was, even in grade one it can happen. I hope parents can teach their kids to be better human beings. No one should be superior. No one should be inferior. Everyone has their own talents and everyone will learn at their own pace.
But most of all, we should always teach our kids to be confident of themselves and their abilities, and to always remember that they are loved no matter what.
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