Diminishing breast milk supply

I delivered Baby A last July 30 via Caesarian section.  Because I had no problem with breast milk supply during my last pregnancy (even being able to nurse my eldest for more than 27 months), I was not in the least bit worried about producing milk a second time around.  What I did not anticipate was the pain I felt when baby A latched on.  I thought, because this was the second time around, I would be okay.  But, nature proved me wrong!  I had forgotten how painful it was for me during the first month when my eldest latched on. Baby A reminded me of the pain.


The pain, however intense it felt, was bearable if it meant being able to offer breast milk to my baby.   I was worried about not being able to bottle feed expressed breast milk though.  So, to make sure I won't encounter this again, I made sure to alternate between allowing baby A to latch on and giving her expressed breast milk.  I was very happy that baby A did not seem to have nipple confusion issues.  What I did not anticipate however, was that my milk supply may be affected by what I was doing.


Exactly 20 days after giving birth, I suddenly could not produce the normal amount of milk I was used to expressing.  From being able to express and store 4 ounces of breast milk easily, I suddenly could not produce even 2 ounces of milk!  It was very depressing for me.  How can I suddenly have diminishing milk supply when just a few hours before I was producing a lot?  I started reading up on it and found out the following:


1.  If you are supplementing with bottle feeding of expressed milk, your milk supply will drop.  Your body adjusts its milk production to the baby's demands.
2.  Breast pumps are not adequate substitutes to direct latch on. Direct latch on stimulates the body to produce more milk.
I have seen this for  myself,  when after expressing milk until I emptied my ducts, baby A latched on, and suddenly, there was milk again!
3.  Always empty your ducts when you express milk.  This will stimulate your body to produce more.
4.  Express milk in between feedings to increase your milk supply.
5.  Drink lots of fluids


After doing all of the above, I noticed my milk supply increase again.  It was quite a scare, but it made me realize that milk supply can be fleeting. There is no room to be lazy if we want to keep breastfeeding.


Breastfeeding is a choice and it takes a lot of commitment.  But, if you really want to breastfeed your baby, you will do what it  takes. So, good luck  to all breastfeeding moms! Give yourself a  pat on the back for your efforts.

Increasing your milk supply

I delivered baby J via Caesarian section 31 months ago.  I remember starting my breastfeeding journey in the recovery room of the hospital, with my journey lasting for all of 27 months.


I never once had a problem with low milk supply during my breastfeeding journey.  In fact, my problem was the other way around.  I had too much milk that baby J vomited on a daily basis due to overfeeding.  Her satiety center was still immature so she didn't know when to stop feeding.


I never thought myself lucky that I had adequate milk supply.  I thought this was the normal course for every post-partum woman.  Until, I met many women whose problem was milk supply.  When people find out that I nursed baby J for a full 27 months, I am often asked what I did to increase my milk supply.  I cannot guarantee that this will work for everyone, but for my part, these are the things I did to ensure I had enough milk supply:


1.  Make sure you drink lots of fluids.
2.  Make sure you take calcium supplement.
3.  Let your baby latch on as often as you can.
4.  Try to express milk in between the baby's feedings.  If your body feels that the demand is high, it will try to increase its supply. Make sure you invest in a good breast pump.  This will go a long way.
5.  Eat lots of horseradish (malunggay  Moringa oleifera).
6.  Take supplements such as Fenugreek.
7.   Drink natural cocoa 2-3 times per day.  Chocolate is known to be a galactagogue.


Some people even go as far as taking medications to boost their milk supply.  I did not want to do this since there are medications which may be passed on to the baby via the breastmilk.  So, breastfeeding moms need to be very careful with food and medication intake.


Breastfeeding has not been an easy task.  There will be pain, there will be times when you will want to stop because it's 24/7 work, you will have to bring your breast pump with you wherever you go, there may be different nipple and breast complications.  But, what kept me going for more than two years was knowing how much it would benefit my daughter.  That alone was enough reason for me to endure everything and persevere. 


Now that I am getting ready for my second baby, there is no question that I would do everything I did for baby J all over again.  Breast pump ready. Breastfeeding bags on standby.  Purelan cream on standby.  Cold nipple compress ready.  Bring it on!  Excited to go on another breastfeeding journey.

Things to prepare for baby number two

As we prepare for the arrival of our second bundle of joy, I cannot help but reminisce about all the preparations we did for the arrival of baby J.  Indeed, it is easier the second time around.  Although, because of the feeling that you've "been there, done that", there is also the nagging fear that we may become too complacent in preparing for the arrival of the second one.

Of course, as we prepare all the things the wee one will need, we also have to consider logistics about taking care of two kids instead of one. 

So, how are we going about our preparations? 

1. Be on the lookout for a good deal.  If you do not follow beliefs that  you cannot buy clothes for an unborn child, then once you find a good bargain, I suggest you start purchasing.  Yes, it may take up a lot of space in the house, but the money you save will be worth it.  This, in addition to the fact that you don't feel the expense as opposed to buying everything in one go.

2. Consider selling pre-loved items.  Because baby J is still using a stroller, especially when we go on our trips overseas, we decided to purchase a stroller for two kids. But because it would be a waste to keep many strollers around the house, we decided to sell our existing stroller, at least it reduces clutter around the house, while at the same time, adding some money to purchase the new one.

3. Start bringing out items of your firstborn.  We already started taking inventory of the things we can re-use for our second one.  Items such as newborn bathing tubs, infant car seat, cot, swaddles, infant pajamas, cloth diapers, and bottles are some of the things we are using for the wee one.

4. Ensure all safety measures are in place.  Because we cannot devote 100% of our time on baby J anymore, we are making sure the house is even more secure than ever.  Make sure there are guard rails along stairs, child-proof every aspect of the house, not for the new baby but for your toddler.

5. Prepare your firstborn for the arrival of the baby.  Since we found out we were having another baby, the hubby and I have always been telling baby J about the arrival of a sibling. She has since so gotten the idea that she always tells me that when the baby comes, she will play mega-bloks or play-doh with the baby.  She would even get milk when we go to the grocery and tell me that she wants to buy it for the baby so the baby can drink it when the baby comes out.

It has been a more challenging pregnancy for me this time around, because you do not only care for yourself and the baby inside you, but also for the toddler you already have who is like the energizer bunny.  But, it has been more fun as well.  Time seems to fly.  Before you know it, you are already in your third trimester of your pregnancy.

For those who are preparing for baby number two or those who have had baby number two already, how are you preparing for the new arrival to the family?  Please do share your thoughts.

Making our children feel loved

Often times we parents are too caught up with the stresses of work that we unknowingly forget to attend to the needs of our children.  Can we actually leave work in the office and devote our full attention to our kids when we get home?    Some parents may argue that they are working for the kids' future, that's why they cannot devote time for the children.  But our children need our time, attention, and love, not the monetary things we can offer them.

So, What are we doing for baby J to make sure that she is confident in our love?

1.  We bring her with us wherever we go.  Be it to the mall or overseas, we never leave home without baby J.  Some people may argue that couples need alone time as well.  That is true.  But, bringing her along works well for the hubby and I.  He does not want to travel without baby J, even if he has to carry an extra luggage because of her. 

We noticed that travelling has been very good for baby J as well.  She does not get fussy on the plane, she is quite flexible to changes in environment and food, and she is not afraid of people.

2. We do not shower her with toys, but with attention. Ever since baby J was born, we made it a point not to buy her many toys.  She already gets toys from relatives and friends, so we felt that it isn't necessary for us to give her even more toys.  So, what do we do instead? We bring her out to play.  When we're in the mall and she sees a toy store, we allow her to explore inside and play for awhile.  When it comes time to go, we just tell her to say goodbye to the toys and then we leave.  So far, I am happy to say that baby J never had a tantrum, demanding us to buy her a toy.  She is content to just explore and leave them.
We normally bring her to playgrounds as well and just let her run around and explore while we keep a close watch over her.

3. We always involve her in decision-making. Even if baby J is only two and a half years old, we always ask her for her opinion, be it for her preferred meal, whether she wants to go out or not, and even where she wants to go.  We even bring her to check out potential schools for her, to see if she likes the place or not.  We normally tell her things as well, relating to her like a small adult.  We also always take time to explain things to her.  You could see understanding on her face when we do this.

4. Bedtime means lots of hugs and kisses.  We always have a bedtime routine of lots of hugs, kisses, and "I love you's".  I have been telling baby J that when people ask her: "Does your mommy love you?", she should always reply:" Yes, very much!"  I also remind her every night that everyone in the family loves her.  Because of these things, I know she is confident of the love of the people around her.  When I ask her sometimes if her mommy loves her, she will say yes and then proceed to elaborate the names of all our relatives and say that all of them love her too.

5.  Always plan activities with the kids.  Because of hubby's erratic work schedule, we don't have the weekends that other people do.  So, any free day of the hubby is a special event for all of us.  We normally plan a trip, even if it's just a trip to the mall, to the movie house, or a day at an amusement park.  We try to make each day off a special one.  We also try to expose her to new experiences whenever possible.

6.  Always listen to what they have to say.  Baby J involves us in all of her imaginative plays and stories.  So, we make it a point to always listen to whatever she has to say, even if we're tired or sleepy.  Because in her eyes, those are big things.  Whenever she has something to say, we give her our full attention, no matter the time, no matter the place.

7. Always ask how they feel. At the end of the day, I always make sure to ask her if she had fun that day.  I just want to check if she enjoyed her day or not.

8. They are always the first priority. The hubby and I always make it a point to make baby J feel that she is our first priority.  Everything we do is always about her.  

I think all these things are helping to mould her into a happy little girl, confident of her parents' love and affection.

What are you doing for your child today?  Please do share.










http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/15-small-things-parents-should-their-children-every-day-make-them-feel-loved.html?dgs=1&fb_ref=Default

You can never be too careful

The six-year old who fell to her death last April 3, 2015 while playing near an escalator in Kuala Lumpur is all over the news.  This very sad incident should remind all parents out there to be extra vigilant when caring for their kids.


We should not only be vigilant in caring for our babies, we need to be even more vigilant in the care of older children because they are the ones who suddenly run off somewhere before we can even say: "STOP!"


Caring for our children is a life-long process. Our kids need various types of care as they grow older.  Especially with the advent of technology when we can be distracted by our phones, the internet, and what have-yous.


Let this article below remind us that One second of neglect can mean a lifetime of regret.


http://www.themalaymailonline.com/malaysia/article/mum-in-escalator-tragedy-under-probe-for-negligence


Vigilance is key.  Let's keep our children safe and hope it never happens to anyone again.

Being a mom rocks!

Before I got married and had a baby, I always thought about the sacrifices a mother had to make to care for a baby.  The physical changes that would permanently mar your body, the career sacrifices a mother had to make, plus all the attention a child would need.  Because of all of these reasons, I never really wanted to have a baby before.  Until I met the right man and wanted to start a family with him.


Then I had the baby.  Who knew my world would make a 360 degree turn!  The ambitious, goal-driven career woman in me completely took a back seat because I wanted to give my daughter as much of  my time and attention as possible. The woman who did not want to "disfigure" her breast by breastfeeding, breastfed her baby for almost 28 months!  Every decision the husband and I did, we considered our daughter above everything else.  Every trip meant bringing baby J along because not being able to bring her would mean just scrapping the trip altogether.


Motherhood changes a person.  For the better.  I have never appreciated life more, never been happier, never been more content, than when I became a mother.


Of course being a parent to a toddler is not all a bed of roses.   But, I always tell my husband that I think we are still very lucky because our daughter is actually not very difficult to manage.  She would still have the tantrums and the fixed mindset of a two-year old from time to time, but most of the time, she is a very sweet, generous little girl who understands way beyond her years.


But all the sacrifices we feel we have made for our baby are returned to us two-fold by this little person.  The joy she brings us is worth more than anything in this world.


Being a parent is both amazing and unnerving.  Just look at your kids and see how much influence you have on their upbringing.   The way we raise them will be the way they will treat everyone  and  everything around them.  I would like to believe that kids' attitude and behavior are based on the environment  they grew up in.  So, if we shower them with our attention and love, they will grow up believing this is the way the world should be. 


When I watch my daughter during her independent play, I know we have done right by her.  She treats her stuffed dolls the way we treat her.  She would shower her dolls with kisses and hugs pretending the doll is her own  baby.  I know she does this because this is the world she grew up in, full of warm hugs and kisses. 


It is also actually quite funny that the things we teach her, she would throw back at us!   Just this morning, baby J actually told my husband:" Daddy, stop playing with your food!" when she saw my husband moving his spoon around before feeding himself.


Every time I watch my daughter doing her own thing, I am overwhelmed by how wonderful it is to be a mom.  Especially when they come up to you out of the blue and just wants to shower you with lots of hugs and kisses!  It's enough to remove all the tiredness and the bad day that you had, and make you think: "It truly rocks to be a Mom!"

Preparing your first born for the arrival of a new baby

When the hubby and I found out that I was pregnant with baby number 2, we started worrying about how baby J would react when she found out about the new baby.  So even when my tummy wasn't showing yet, I started telling her that Mommy has a baby in her tummy.  Initially, it seemed like she didn't understand and didn't care. 


As my tummy grew bigger, we then started telling her that Mommy cannot carry her anymore because  Mommy has a baby in her tummy, that only Daddy can carry her.  She protested about it for a  few weeks, until one day, she just suddenly told me: " Mommy cannot carry J(referring to herself) because Mommy has a baby  in her tummy.  Only Daddy can carry J."  From then on, I noticed that she never asked me to carry her anymore.  Instead, she would always approach her dad and ask to be carried.  She also started talking to my belly a lot.  She would say: "Hi Baby!  What are you doing?  Are you awake?"  She would also caress and kiss my tummy when she spoke to the baby.


As a mother who was  worried how my only child would react to a sibling, it was quite a relief to see  that my fears were unfounded (for the moment at least, since I am still to see how baby J would react when she finally sees the new baby).  It is also truly amazing how much a two-year old can grasp information.  Often times  we underestimate toddlers thinking they are too young to understand many things so we don't bother explaining things to them.  But I found out very early that no matter how young they are, they do understand the things we tell them.  That is why I told her about her sibling very early.


Another thing we did is maintain everything we normally do with baby J.  We still give her the same amount of hugs and kisses like before.  We still give her our undivided attention.  I think this also helps in making her feel secure that nothing will change when the new baby comes.  I  also always ask her if she will help Mommy take care of the new baby when he/she arrives.


I am still a bit worried how things will be when the baby finally arrives.   But I am pretty confident that baby J would make a very good big sister.  This thought is more than enough to sustain me.

Weaning ...the frustrations and success

Two years, 3 months and 18 days. That is the amount of time I have been nursing baby J. However, it has been five days since baby J last breastfed.  It  was not voluntary on her part to discontinue latching on, but my decision to start weaning her.


Since I found out that baby number 2 is coming, I have started trying (half-heartedly) to wean baby J.  This was met with a lot of tears and frustration from baby J.  So, in the initial phase, I eventually gave in to the demand to latch on.  Because I wasn't home in the afternoons, it was easy to cut off the afternoon feeding. So, she would only nurse at night and before she woke up in the morning.  These two times were the most important for her, mostly just for comfort and not really for feeding since she has been eating food very well the entire day.


But these two times were the most challenging for me, weaning-wise.  Every time I tried to withhold either of those feedings, she would get frustrated and cry until I gave in.  I thought I would never be able to wean her off, which frustrated me at times and caused a lot of physical discomfort brought about by breast tenderness due to pregnancy.  So, I decided to explain things to her, on why I wanted her to stop nursing soon.  I told her about the baby in Mommy's tummy and the pain nursing was causing me. 


My baby is so mature in a lot of ways.  I believe the adult-speak we have always used on her is helping in her maturity.  She understands our explanations most of the time.  In this instance, I believe this helped me wean her.


When I tell her that I am hurting from the nursing, she would then bargain with me and tell me that she will only nurse "fast".  So I would allow her to do this and when I tell her it's hurting me already, she would stop and request for "the other side".  We had this routine for a few weeks.  Because we have been nursing for shorter periods already, she would then request for her milk after nursing.  She would then ask me to hug her or tap her until she fell asleep.  Until 5 days ago, when she didn't ask to nurse before bed.  She just cuddled up to me and promptly fell asleep.  The morning after, she also didn't ask to nurse when she woke up.  We just went directly to the breakfast table.


In a way, I guess this was also baby-directed weaning for us coupled with gradual weaning.  Since she would nurse for comfort before going to bed, I just made sure that we cuddled a lot before bedtime and kept her close as she drifts off to sleep.


Baby J still asks to nurse every time I put her to sleep.  But when I tell her that we don't breastfeed anymore, she doesn't put up a fuss anymore.  She would just cuddle up to me until she fell asleep.  Personally, I think she only does this to try her luck and see if she can get lucky.  That's how cheeky my baby is! Haha.


After months of trying to wean her, I have finally succeeded!  And this is a very sweet victory for both of us.  I did not rush baby J, I waited for her to finally be ready.  Surprisingly, I was not saddened by this sudden loss of intimacy with baby J.  We still do a lot of cuddling before she goes to sleep, possibly even more cuddling now than ever before. 


So, moms out there, don't get frustrated when you try to wean your babies/toddlers.  They will do it when they are ready, in their own sweet time.  Good luck!

The beauty of being a Mom

In the first few months after I gave birth to baby  J, I couldn't imagine myself going through the whole pregnancy process again.  Sure, I knew my baby had to have a sibling, but, the thought of getting pregnant again, with all the symptoms I had plus going through the post-op pain of a C-section, I didn't even want to think of getting pregnant.


But, I fell in love with my daughter; and the hubby and I have been having a blast raising her that after awhile, I felt myself wanting to be  pregnant again. When I saw pregnant ladies  in the mall, I would think to myself how nice it was to be pregnant again.  That was my cue that I was ready for another baby.  I no longer remembered my past pregnancy discomforts, rather, I remembered how much  fun it was to have a little person in the house.


And so, here we are, on another exhilarating journey of pregnancy, but this time, with a two-year old to take care of as well.  This is why I haven't been able to write in the last few months. Between work, family, and pregnancy symptoms, I am bushed!


Things have been more difficult now compared to the first pregnancy, since you not only have to take care of the baby growing inside you, but also the little lady jumping and running around the house who also needs your love and attention.


But of course, with all the difficulties, comes the joy of knowing that soon, there will not  be one, but two sources of joy!  And being the resilient human beings  that we are, we trudge on through the nausea,  vomiting, and what-have-you to experience this overwhelming joy all over again.  That is the beauty of being a mom!