8 Things nobody tells you about Breastfeding

I am an advocate of breastfeeding, having breastfed my eldest for almost 28 months and now, breastfeeding my second. 

Breastfeeding is not all a bed of roses. We always read about the benefits of breastfeeding, but nobody tells us what it truly entails.  So, let me share with you my experiences on breastfeeding.

1. Breastfeeding is painful.  At least during the first month and in the first few minutes of each feeding.  When I gave birth to my eldest, I, of course, wanted to breastfeed her because of all the benefits it can offer.  However, nobody told me that I would be in excruciating pain when she latched on.  So, for every feeding, I had to squeeze the hubby's hands tight just to get through the first few minutes of latching.  I was sure it was not a poor latch on my baby's part since she was always satisfied after, and she had very good weight gain.  But, things got better after the first month.  There was no more pain.

2. Breastfeeding can be messy.  Once your milk production is up, your production will be more than what your baby requires, especially in the first few months.  Always make sure you have breast pads.  If you don't, all your clothes and underwear will be soaked with milk and turn hard and yellowish.

3. Breast milk is a magnet for ants.  Make sure you clean every drop, whether you are nursing, expressing milk, or just preparing to feed through the bottle.

4. Breastfeeding can cause milk blister.  If you do not express milk frequently, you are at risk for developing milk blisters.  So, how do you know if you have it?  You may notice a white "blob" under the skin of the nipple which then causes clogging of the ducts under this, leading to hardening of the breast.  I had this with my eldest.  But to prevent it from getting worse, I had to poke the milk blister with a sterile needle to release it and prevent any further clogging.  This did relieve me of the pain of unexpressed milk.

5. Breastfeeding may cause sore nipples.  My babies think of me as their personal "pacifier". Naturally, they latch on for prolonged periods, which eventually leads to sore nipples. So,how do I alleviate sore nipples?  Try expressing a few drops of milk and applying it to the affected nipple.  You can also apply lanolin to the affected nipple.

6. Wear a nursing bra.  Nursing bras are there for a reason.  It makes nursing infinitely easier.

7. Buy a nursing cover.  Babies will nurse anytime, anywhere. It is best to bring along a nursing cover to maintain your modesty so babies can feed uninterrupted.  Make sure to choose a nursing cover that will not suffocate your baby though.

8. Nursing blouse/dress does help a lot in helping to protect your modesty. They are a bit pricey though.

But, despite all these minor inconveniences and discomfort, I still chose to breastfeed my baby because the benefits it offers far outweigh the inconvenience .  And once you get used to it, you will miss having your baby latch on when they finally stop breastfeeding.

Please check my other blog post on the benefits of breastfeeding below:
http://pedramusings.blogspot.sg/2014/02/breastfeeding-benefits-my-personal.html

Starting school and growing up

Baby J will be starting school tomorrow.  The first time she will be away from us for one whole day.  As I am preparing her things for school, I can't help but feel sad that my daughter is growing up so fast.  I know I need to let her go at some point, but I cannot help but worry too for her.  

I know I may be underestimating my daughter's ability to care for herself.  But I now understand what other mothers are going through when they need to send their kids to school for the first time.  You worry that they will not eat on their own, that they will lose weight because of this.  You worry that there may be mosquitoes in school.  You worry that they will be lonely on their first day.  You worry that they may not make friends easily.  You worry that they will not listen to their teacher.  All these anxious thoughts are going through your mind, while for your little one, tomorow is just another normal day.

As I type this, I have both kids beside me, baby A on my lap, and baby J beside me coloring her numbers book.  I am worried of sending them out into the world, but at the same time, I want to prepare them for the world, make sure they will be fine on their own when they grow up.

Such is the dilemma of every parent, I'm sure.  When do we hold on and when do we let them go?  I may sound so dramatic, since my little girl is only going to pre-school.  But now, I understand the emotions of all moms who had to go through this stage.  I salute each and every one of you for finding the strength to share them with the world!

Caring for two

The last few months have been a whirlwind for the family, as we welcomed baby A into the family.  We are now a family of four, travelling with a baby and a toddler in tow.

I would be lying if I told you the last 5 months have been easy for me.  It was not.  During the first two months after I delivered, I seriously thought I might be having post-partum blues.  Even the husband became worried, with him working overseas most of the time, and me, left to care for both kids.  The stress of having to care for a tiny newborn, coupled with the jealousy of a toddler, the pain of a C-section, and the beginning of my Masters studies has really put me in a huge rollercoaster ride.

But I still count myself lucky because I have parents who are helping me care for the kids. Were it not for them, I don't think I can care for 2 kids on my own, especially during the first two months when baby J's jealousy was at its peak, and where baby A was at her most vulnerable.  My husband is also very hands-on, making it easier for me as well.  Even without a nanny to help us, we were still able to go about our daily chores, bring baby J for her gymnastics class, go shopping, and even go overseas! 

There are however, infinitely more challenges when you are caring for 2 kids because both need attention, but they have varying levels of need.  My toddler has been practicing her stair-climbing and jumping ability, so every chance she gets, she tries to go up and down the stairs (without adult supervision), which scares the entire household!  At the same time she's doing this, the littlest one is crying for her milk, vomiting when she has too much to drink. 

With the hubby around, normally, we each care for one child, with myself normally looking after baby J since she asks for me more, while the hubby cares for baby A.  But when baby A is hungry, we then switch kids because baby A needs to latch on to me.  It is not so bad also when it is just me and the two kids because generally, baby J understands what I tell her already while baby A on the other hand, now has better neck control as well, so we go out with baby J holding my hand and baby A on a baby carrier.

At night, once the kids are in bed, I then start catching up on my studies and work.  The husband and I are naturally very tired, but it is still a joy caring for the little ones, and we wouldn't swap the experience for the world!

Diminishing breast milk supply

I delivered Baby A last July 30 via Caesarian section.  Because I had no problem with breast milk supply during my last pregnancy (even being able to nurse my eldest for more than 27 months), I was not in the least bit worried about producing milk a second time around.  What I did not anticipate was the pain I felt when baby A latched on.  I thought, because this was the second time around, I would be okay.  But, nature proved me wrong!  I had forgotten how painful it was for me during the first month when my eldest latched on. Baby A reminded me of the pain.


The pain, however intense it felt, was bearable if it meant being able to offer breast milk to my baby.   I was worried about not being able to bottle feed expressed breast milk though.  So, to make sure I won't encounter this again, I made sure to alternate between allowing baby A to latch on and giving her expressed breast milk.  I was very happy that baby A did not seem to have nipple confusion issues.  What I did not anticipate however, was that my milk supply may be affected by what I was doing.


Exactly 20 days after giving birth, I suddenly could not produce the normal amount of milk I was used to expressing.  From being able to express and store 4 ounces of breast milk easily, I suddenly could not produce even 2 ounces of milk!  It was very depressing for me.  How can I suddenly have diminishing milk supply when just a few hours before I was producing a lot?  I started reading up on it and found out the following:


1.  If you are supplementing with bottle feeding of expressed milk, your milk supply will drop.  Your body adjusts its milk production to the baby's demands.
2.  Breast pumps are not adequate substitutes to direct latch on. Direct latch on stimulates the body to produce more milk.
I have seen this for  myself,  when after expressing milk until I emptied my ducts, baby A latched on, and suddenly, there was milk again!
3.  Always empty your ducts when you express milk.  This will stimulate your body to produce more.
4.  Express milk in between feedings to increase your milk supply.
5.  Drink lots of fluids


After doing all of the above, I noticed my milk supply increase again.  It was quite a scare, but it made me realize that milk supply can be fleeting. There is no room to be lazy if we want to keep breastfeeding.


Breastfeeding is a choice and it takes a lot of commitment.  But, if you really want to breastfeed your baby, you will do what it  takes. So, good luck  to all breastfeeding moms! Give yourself a  pat on the back for your efforts.

Increasing your milk supply

I delivered baby J via Caesarian section 31 months ago.  I remember starting my breastfeeding journey in the recovery room of the hospital, with my journey lasting for all of 27 months.


I never once had a problem with low milk supply during my breastfeeding journey.  In fact, my problem was the other way around.  I had too much milk that baby J vomited on a daily basis due to overfeeding.  Her satiety center was still immature so she didn't know when to stop feeding.


I never thought myself lucky that I had adequate milk supply.  I thought this was the normal course for every post-partum woman.  Until, I met many women whose problem was milk supply.  When people find out that I nursed baby J for a full 27 months, I am often asked what I did to increase my milk supply.  I cannot guarantee that this will work for everyone, but for my part, these are the things I did to ensure I had enough milk supply:


1.  Make sure you drink lots of fluids.
2.  Make sure you take calcium supplement.
3.  Let your baby latch on as often as you can.
4.  Try to express milk in between the baby's feedings.  If your body feels that the demand is high, it will try to increase its supply. Make sure you invest in a good breast pump.  This will go a long way.
5.  Eat lots of horseradish (malunggay  Moringa oleifera).
6.  Take supplements such as Fenugreek.
7.   Drink natural cocoa 2-3 times per day.  Chocolate is known to be a galactagogue.


Some people even go as far as taking medications to boost their milk supply.  I did not want to do this since there are medications which may be passed on to the baby via the breastmilk.  So, breastfeeding moms need to be very careful with food and medication intake.


Breastfeeding has not been an easy task.  There will be pain, there will be times when you will want to stop because it's 24/7 work, you will have to bring your breast pump with you wherever you go, there may be different nipple and breast complications.  But, what kept me going for more than two years was knowing how much it would benefit my daughter.  That alone was enough reason for me to endure everything and persevere. 


Now that I am getting ready for my second baby, there is no question that I would do everything I did for baby J all over again.  Breast pump ready. Breastfeeding bags on standby.  Purelan cream on standby.  Cold nipple compress ready.  Bring it on!  Excited to go on another breastfeeding journey.

Things to prepare for baby number two

As we prepare for the arrival of our second bundle of joy, I cannot help but reminisce about all the preparations we did for the arrival of baby J.  Indeed, it is easier the second time around.  Although, because of the feeling that you've "been there, done that", there is also the nagging fear that we may become too complacent in preparing for the arrival of the second one.

Of course, as we prepare all the things the wee one will need, we also have to consider logistics about taking care of two kids instead of one. 

So, how are we going about our preparations? 

1. Be on the lookout for a good deal.  If you do not follow beliefs that  you cannot buy clothes for an unborn child, then once you find a good bargain, I suggest you start purchasing.  Yes, it may take up a lot of space in the house, but the money you save will be worth it.  This, in addition to the fact that you don't feel the expense as opposed to buying everything in one go.

2. Consider selling pre-loved items.  Because baby J is still using a stroller, especially when we go on our trips overseas, we decided to purchase a stroller for two kids. But because it would be a waste to keep many strollers around the house, we decided to sell our existing stroller, at least it reduces clutter around the house, while at the same time, adding some money to purchase the new one.

3. Start bringing out items of your firstborn.  We already started taking inventory of the things we can re-use for our second one.  Items such as newborn bathing tubs, infant car seat, cot, swaddles, infant pajamas, cloth diapers, and bottles are some of the things we are using for the wee one.

4. Ensure all safety measures are in place.  Because we cannot devote 100% of our time on baby J anymore, we are making sure the house is even more secure than ever.  Make sure there are guard rails along stairs, child-proof every aspect of the house, not for the new baby but for your toddler.

5. Prepare your firstborn for the arrival of the baby.  Since we found out we were having another baby, the hubby and I have always been telling baby J about the arrival of a sibling. She has since so gotten the idea that she always tells me that when the baby comes, she will play mega-bloks or play-doh with the baby.  She would even get milk when we go to the grocery and tell me that she wants to buy it for the baby so the baby can drink it when the baby comes out.

It has been a more challenging pregnancy for me this time around, because you do not only care for yourself and the baby inside you, but also for the toddler you already have who is like the energizer bunny.  But, it has been more fun as well.  Time seems to fly.  Before you know it, you are already in your third trimester of your pregnancy.

For those who are preparing for baby number two or those who have had baby number two already, how are you preparing for the new arrival to the family?  Please do share your thoughts.

Making our children feel loved

Often times we parents are too caught up with the stresses of work that we unknowingly forget to attend to the needs of our children.  Can we actually leave work in the office and devote our full attention to our kids when we get home?    Some parents may argue that they are working for the kids' future, that's why they cannot devote time for the children.  But our children need our time, attention, and love, not the monetary things we can offer them.

So, What are we doing for baby J to make sure that she is confident in our love?

1.  We bring her with us wherever we go.  Be it to the mall or overseas, we never leave home without baby J.  Some people may argue that couples need alone time as well.  That is true.  But, bringing her along works well for the hubby and I.  He does not want to travel without baby J, even if he has to carry an extra luggage because of her. 

We noticed that travelling has been very good for baby J as well.  She does not get fussy on the plane, she is quite flexible to changes in environment and food, and she is not afraid of people.

2. We do not shower her with toys, but with attention. Ever since baby J was born, we made it a point not to buy her many toys.  She already gets toys from relatives and friends, so we felt that it isn't necessary for us to give her even more toys.  So, what do we do instead? We bring her out to play.  When we're in the mall and she sees a toy store, we allow her to explore inside and play for awhile.  When it comes time to go, we just tell her to say goodbye to the toys and then we leave.  So far, I am happy to say that baby J never had a tantrum, demanding us to buy her a toy.  She is content to just explore and leave them.
We normally bring her to playgrounds as well and just let her run around and explore while we keep a close watch over her.

3. We always involve her in decision-making. Even if baby J is only two and a half years old, we always ask her for her opinion, be it for her preferred meal, whether she wants to go out or not, and even where she wants to go.  We even bring her to check out potential schools for her, to see if she likes the place or not.  We normally tell her things as well, relating to her like a small adult.  We also always take time to explain things to her.  You could see understanding on her face when we do this.

4. Bedtime means lots of hugs and kisses.  We always have a bedtime routine of lots of hugs, kisses, and "I love you's".  I have been telling baby J that when people ask her: "Does your mommy love you?", she should always reply:" Yes, very much!"  I also remind her every night that everyone in the family loves her.  Because of these things, I know she is confident of the love of the people around her.  When I ask her sometimes if her mommy loves her, she will say yes and then proceed to elaborate the names of all our relatives and say that all of them love her too.

5.  Always plan activities with the kids.  Because of hubby's erratic work schedule, we don't have the weekends that other people do.  So, any free day of the hubby is a special event for all of us.  We normally plan a trip, even if it's just a trip to the mall, to the movie house, or a day at an amusement park.  We try to make each day off a special one.  We also try to expose her to new experiences whenever possible.

6.  Always listen to what they have to say.  Baby J involves us in all of her imaginative plays and stories.  So, we make it a point to always listen to whatever she has to say, even if we're tired or sleepy.  Because in her eyes, those are big things.  Whenever she has something to say, we give her our full attention, no matter the time, no matter the place.

7. Always ask how they feel. At the end of the day, I always make sure to ask her if she had fun that day.  I just want to check if she enjoyed her day or not.

8. They are always the first priority. The hubby and I always make it a point to make baby J feel that she is our first priority.  Everything we do is always about her.  

I think all these things are helping to mould her into a happy little girl, confident of her parents' love and affection.

What are you doing for your child today?  Please do share.










http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/15-small-things-parents-should-their-children-every-day-make-them-feel-loved.html?dgs=1&fb_ref=Default